Energy, Carnies, Faces

It’s been too long since I’ve posted. My brain’s more or less been scrambled for the past week. Apparently I’m still working through the tour phase where my body fully accepts and even embraces sleep deprivation and constant motion, not to mention noise.


Every tour has this shape in energy, where the first 10 or so days are super excited and jacked up, then there’s a crash where you hit a wall, can’t function, and hate everyone, and then you break through that and suddenly your reality adjusts to tour life and it all makes sense again. From there on out, it’s smooth sailing…generally.

This shape seems to be taking a little longer to play out than it has in previous tours, which may be due to our daily schedule being so different than your average club tour.


Last week or so, Brian said “We’re basically carnies.”

The noise, the dust, the lifting, the smell of funnel cakes and lemonade, kicking through piles of garbage rolling through the wind in the afternoon – we’re basically living on carnival grounds all day, every day. Makes me want to find a creek to bathe in and a girl’s mountain bike to steal. I’m speaking from my own eye-witness account, of course.


Something great happened today in Minneapolis.

The crowd there wasn’t giant (though it was definitely nicely filled – we’re seriously spoiled), but there was an especially high percentage of devoted, excited kids in there.

I focused a lot on these kids during the set. Really watched their faces. So many of them were singing along with every word, jumping, just kicking ass. I would make eye contact with them occasionally and we would sing at each other.

There’s almost always a handful of people singing along at our shows, but for whatever reason seeing it today really felt overwhelming. It really kicked my ass on stage. Another intense rush of cosmic energy.

Too often I go on stage and see a crowd and I see them as a number, a challenge, an objective accomplishment. But these are people! Humans and characters who have entire lives and problems and joys and things to do outside of the half hour I spend trying to impress them and convince them to buy shit!

Who the hell are these strangers? How have these songs brought us all together, in a field in Minneapolis, to share in this weird, public yet extremely intimate interaction? Brian’s words are being recited back to him every day, by people who really believe in them, and are seriously energized by them. Wow. How?

I guess we’re well enough into the tour that the logistics and kinks are no longer pressing concerns and I can finally focus on what’s happening on a deeper level, let it really sink in.

This is heavy, heavy stuff, man.

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One thought on “Energy, Carnies, Faces

  1. this is great!!

    i was planning on just posting a 2-3 sentence response to this, but it inevitably turned into a rant that i will delay posting until the morning when i actually have time to sit down and make it articulate, thus sparing you the trouble of attempting to make sense of my incoherent ravings.

    or maybe i’ll refrain in the interest of not cluttering your page. i don’t know. lemme know if you’re remotely interested and i’ll probably just message it to you.

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